I love heartfelt powerful writing, and it always comes from places/people I least expect it.

Recently, an Irish mother, wrote a letter to Irish justice minister Dermot Ahern after her son received no response from him after his own letter was sent. I guess she thought it was time to step in. She sent her own letter, with such simple and well put words its hard not to feel a bit invigorated by it. Something I'll read anytime things are looking shit, till the day I die .
Love rules :)

Below is the letter in full.

Dear Mr Ahern,

My name is Helen Doody, you have already received and failed to reply to a letter that my own son Declan sent to you a week or so ago. So like any good and decent parent I am now trying to get you to listen to and protect my child – it is the very least that any mother would do for her own children.

I read Declan’s email and everything he said to you in the e-mail was true. He had a very tough time growing up in Abbeyfeale, I can still picture him crying in the mornings before he went to school because he was afraid of the people who were going to be waiting for him – bullies who would beat the living daylight out of him, people who crushed the very spirit within him. I tried numerous times to help him, I spoke to teachers, to the parents but the problem got a quick-fix but a weeks later it just continued on.

Declan was always a very shy and quiet boy but as the bullying continued he became more and more invisible. His Dad and I spent nights talking about him, wondering would he go to school in the morning, would he come home that evening with a ripped jumper or would his school copies be destroyed, we tried so hard to get him the help he needed but as the bullying continued, he started to shut his family out.

All of this began to change however the day Declan came out to me. I am not going to pretend that I handled it like a saint, it is a shock to the system, you don’t think about your child being gay, you just assume they are straight and when Declan told me I didn’t know what to do. I thought I had done something wrong, I thought it was my fault, I really thought that this was it for my son, when people started to find out that he was gay his entire world would turn into a living hell but it didn’t.

Over the coming weeks he began to change, I finally started to see him smile again and there was something different about his heart too. I saw my son reach a very dark and lonely place at the age of 16 but even at his lowest my son, had the courage and strength to come out and say he was gay.

He went to college with a new look on life, he finally seemed to be enjoying himself and it was only then I realised that there was nothing wrong with Declan. If my son was happy, if he was no longer worried about what other people thought about him then I knew that there was nothing wrong with being gay.

For many years he had kept a secret from me and his family because he thought we would reject him, like so many people had done to him before and now at the age of 23 he has graduated with a degree, a higher diploma and a masters. He has become the fine young man that his father and I are so very proud to be able to call our son.

When I heard on the news that gay people would now finally be able to register the relationships like any married couple I finally thought things had changed and I suppose many other people around the country like me thought the same. However I have now realised that what you plan on doing is nothing short of telling the gay community that they are still not equal. You will not tell my sons that they are not equal to their brothers, friends and the rest of society. Your Civil Partnership Bill is not good enough for my family, and hundreds, thousands of other families in this country. I might not be the smartest person in this country but even I can tell you that this bill is all but worthless and will only further the opinion that gay people are not the same as everyone else.

I have been there for all my sons when they have had their hearts broken by girlfriends and boyfriends. I helped them pick out gifts on Valentines day and shopped around for a Tux for the Debs. I have met boyfriends and girlfriends, I have liked some and been frosty to others. I have thought about each and every single of them getting married to someone that they love and who will love them back as much as I do.

I have six sons Mr Ahern, six very beautiful boys who became six very beautiful and upstanding young men!

Two of my boys are gay. Four are straight. Two are firemen. Two love playing video games. One loves to cook. Three of them love cars. Five of them have had their tonsils out.

All of them are my sons.

You have the power to change this country so do the right thing and change this country for the better, wake up and realise that there is still time to clean up this mess and give gay couples the same rights as straight couples.

I am asking on behalf of my gay children, their gay friends, my gay friends, my family, I am asking you as a member of this country, as a taxpayer but most of all I am asking you as a mother, to help my children and revise this Bill so everyone in this country can be equal.

Yours truly,

Helen Doody

Source: Pinknews.co.uk

when a U-turn favors equality

I know updates aren't frequent on this blog, but now and again I come across something that makes me thank the earth I'm alive.
as far as politics goes, I tend not to read too much, I don't want to get caught up in the arguments of people who generally complicate simple issues and refuse to solve the actual complicated ones. However, recently, the gay marridge debate which grips America, mostly California's proposition 8 out-rage, is a current and important topic, with many arguments for both sides.
To me it was simple - you have a bunch of people who want something, and this something is a deeply personal thing that couples do when they love each other enough to decide that spending the rest of their short life's together is what they want.
on the other side, you have people who already have this benefit, telling the other ones that they simply shouldn't have it. Of course they have reasons and arguments, but at the end of the day - in the greatest democracy on earth, we still have a non-secular argument getting in the way of something millions of people want, its almost frustrating watching the endless discussion on the topic while the months roll on....and still these people aren't allowed to do something THAT HAS NO FUCKING EFFECT OR IMPACT ON THE GODDAMN LIFES OF OTHERS.
The free world got over homosexuality a long time ago - a percentage of the population are simply gay. NO less. No more. They dont harm anyone, they have a positive impact on many life's, and goddamn do they know how to have fun.
So the point I'm getting at is...

Its nice....its nice to see someone who sat against gay marridge for years, finally come to his senses, take a risk, and renounce his position.

That takes balls. More balls than the cowards behind those weak arguments have between them.

He is a New York Senator, and you should read this :

http://www.pinknews.co.uk/news/articles/2005-11760.html

2 guys or 2 gals choosing to spend their days together isn't a bad thing, and perhaps a massive solution to the massive amounts of COMPLETELY ABANDONED CHILDREN who need loving homes instead of foster care and rag-doll adoption. Get over your pride nae-Sayer's.
Equality and dignity and respect - its something any tax paying, civilised person deserves, so if all goes well, this fiasco will be over within the next few years, and the world becomes a happier place.

Whatever your position on the subject - try not to jump to either side of the argument without first asking from the point of view of values like democracy, freedom, equality, liberty, human rights. You will quickly find that there is no reason why anyone should be denied a civilised union, or partnership, of marridge - regardless of sexuality or gender.

life's too fucking short peeps, live and let live.

-Peace.

Time, memory

Been long time since I posted anything on here, mainly because I'm not sure anymore what I can put on here. I'm not sure what I want from this. I cant think of any reasons right now, but there's so much I want but will do very little to get, so many mixed 'big' idea's about anything I start. Do I keep this simple and post in my usual infrequent rate, ranting about things I would like to think someone else cared about and keep it on that nice distant level were the agreement between me and the reader is a witty comment and the promise I wont get too deep?

Well, having been, to be honest, completely stoned off my face for the last few weeks, time has come for a shakeup, one of those life 'moments' were you decided enough of that, and more of this, context based. I guess I seen I even seen this one coming in slow motion, almost letting things happen and accepting as they happened, that, it was the set truth, that nothing I did would change that moment from continuing its path, and just letting it happen, like I'm on one big one-way system through time, just a visitor on what's happening. A big part of me wants to believe sometimes that nothing around me is in my control and I just have to exist alongside things for a while before politely leaving without saying anything, but I know its not true, at all. I control a good deal of things in my life, and pretty well, but either I'm loosing that ability and the mental condition is a reaction to fearing change in myself, the brain panicking its loosing its power to control its body and its environment, wether that be friend, family, career, life, relationships, and so on...

The phrase 'everything means nothing' keeps popping up in my head, and were I'm not a classic nihilist in any sense, the little phrase offers this odd sense of comfort, there's allot of things rushing through my head thinking about that phrase, so much its hard picking one example of how oddly comforting I find it when I consider everything, existence, who I am, and what it means to know that in all that we are, wont mean anything because the grand vastness of existence is so much more than we'll know, and by the string of luck, we got our 15 seconds of shame on this rock, and it was fantastic, tragedies aside. And don't assume because of what I'm saying, I'm going to go out on the streets and start a wave of anarchy. Quite the opposite. Its helped/helping me realise and affirm every decision and choice I make. The words I speak, the life I led, the things I knew, will probably never be known to anyone in 100 years, life will have moved on and forgotten most of what's happened in our lifetimes; but so what? there's nearly 8 billion of us. The number of memorable names that'll come from this 8 billion in 100 years will be in the thousands, maybe less. In this life, we're lucky to have even been born. Existence cant matter, it makes so sense to claim that it does and that somehow we're in a position to care about it. What matters is the 15 seconds humanity got on the stage, how we treat the people who we care for and who cares for you, good decent people. I'm finding myself accepting this idea openly. I have a short stab at life, and pretty much anything I do or have done wont affect the grander scale moving's in the universe, but I have an honest accepting that the people in my life and in my heart matter to me, and I gotta keep them safe, and we gotta get on with other people and have a goddamn lot of fun while doing it. Don't want to waste those 15 seconds.

 

After watching an interesting film with my flatm8 the other Day, an interesting point about memory came up, and gave me a bit of a chill, one of those change of perception moments. The girl on screen had described how she commonly got this feeling where she felt she was an old lady looking back through her memories, reliving them, as if making her way through a memory album. Instantly I related with it, having sometimes got this feeling that everything that happened in real time in my life was another memory I was acting out. Now, I'm not saying that I'm really an old man having flashbacks, and If I am, please shoot me, but its the chilling reminder that everything we are is only memory, records, electric pulses in a brain, the collective grandeur of our gene-pool, gravestones, literature. Its what it comes down to. I sit here using a computer, inputting what's in my mind, even then, what I'm thinking of, is just a memory of what I was thinking of, time always moving forward still out-runs the electric pulses between our brain cells. These words are technically just another memory, from one type of computer, to another type, and preferably to allot more computers. As your read these words, this sentence will already be a memory to you. That's just the way it is though, it doesn't mean anything, its how things have always worked. Our gene's are a good example of memory. The human gene pool, is humanity, it is us, the gene's that exist on the planet right now are the gene's that will go on to mingle and merge and produce the next entries in the big gene diary. People who breed, pass forward millions of years of slow progress to the next generation and as we all pass away, the gene pool just keeps going!

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Honesty a joke?

Is it?

 

No not really. I normally pride myself on honesty, its something I find very important. however, I'm far to dishonest with myself at times and could do with kick up the arse on this one.

I'm proud of who I am, I have no reason not to be.  But still I crush certain aspects out of fear of implication on me and relationships with family members. Family aren't people I can curt hurt on purpose, but its never that smooth.

At this point, I have to keep in mind some words my dad told me years ago, which was how every person comes up to a test in their life, one set-piece that they must face up to and look it down. He had his own adventures in his life that made him who he is, and so far in my life, its been gentle nudges, and for the longest time I somewhat eagerly awaited this 'big test' of life that would land itself on me. But the big shock was how it crept up. Something I knew would make or break me for years and could never admit the task. Something I thought I had already settled too. The test I think is on me now and I'm slowly facing up to it. I'm proud of who I am, always will be, and its about time I took some pride in that. The end result is hopefully I'll have a stronger relationship with my parents and my family. This test is to me and I wish anyone else the best of luck on any big tests life throws at you. Be proud of who you are in every sense, warts 'n all.

YouTube - A/s/l ?

 

Grandma Puff

 

http://www.latimes.com/media/photo/2008-02/35645978.jpg

 

Legend.

Late Night Rambling

 

Again I've arrived at the stage in the year where I've massive amounts of work to be getting on with. Lots of it. Tons of it. Yet, I cant find myself to even feel remotely motivated to do it. The reason for this I've yet to work out, but being in a creative sort of course, its possibly the worst sort of feeling because nothing will happen unless I start feeling the buzz to create, I'm completely dependant on that strive to create in order to get things done. Now, having my own up's and downs is becoming pretty normal, so I'm assuming something is in the way and I cant quite figure it out. Alcohol and weed only offer temporary solace for dealing with things, and in the long run really doesnt work.

   I'll need to dig deep into this one. The soul needs to be enriched, inspired and moved and I'm not feeling any of that right now, something that normally courses through my veins with vigour has somehow vanished, or simply, been used up. If inspiration is the currency exchange for artistic output, then I am a very poor man right now.

  I need a solution, and fast, time waits for no one, nor does it make room for introvert creative's, no matter how much we beg of it. A phrase I seem to repeat alot in my head is "Time, my master", perhaps its become a personal nemesis, the sort of one you cant beat, but then, that's true of us all. Time always wins.

In the next few weeks, I have an animation to start and complete, a film to conceive and direct, an album cover to design, 3D production to learn and produce and a game to build and develop and some paintings to do. Its all so much, but I get the strangest feeling I'll get it all sorted under the incoming storm of stress and panic.

Inspiration is my motivation and I best go find some.

Christmas time, petrol bombs and crime, children drinking wiskey and wine!

Its Christmas day and I’ve been debating with myself as to whether or not it matters that Christmas is a religious holiday or not. I know my answer already, still, I’ll run over it in my head, probably just refining it, or maybe I’m just annoyed at how happy I am with my answer, irritated with how little resistance its met with.

First off, if I’m asked, I’ll say, that for me, Christmas is a time were I can personally celebrate and spend time with friends and family and enjoy the time we spend together as a unit, the people I grew up with, who embraced me. This is not devoid of spirituality in itself*. So for me Christmas is a personal holiday, with a Christian name. So what? To me it doesn’t matter what ‘Christmas really means’, a phrase to many Christians hiss at the non believers partaking in the commercial hype. It simply doesn’t to me anyway. The only people it should matter to are Christians, and even that’s pushing it, given the history of the holiday and its foundations. On a basic level its about the birth of their messiah, the ill-fated Jesus guy and all the bullshit surrounding that, blah blah blah.

*Spirituality to me exists merely as a metaphor for the emotional and personal totality of a person. Its not some weird supernatural thing, merely a word used to describe the total essence of a person or an experience.

As the festive season heats up, observe how little it matters what the foundations of the holiday are, keep an eye on how regardless of the religious message, a good time will be had by most of us. And as far as the whole Santa thing goes, it should be dropped, I personally disapprove of lying to children for the sake of added ‘magic’. To me real magic is appreciated in the fact that loved ones generously give so willingly to one another on this one day, something worth far more to me than a fat red clothed pedophile flying down chimneys to tell kids how naughty or nice they’ve been. Hello Santa, meet my shotgun!

Now as a nontheist, or atheist, or simply someone who dosent follow any god or goddess's, I'm usually expected to be the dry hum-bug character, and to a degree I am, usually blowing silly 'magical' christmas myths for 6 anytime I can, but I grew up with this stuff, I love christmas! I have some very fond memories and I get caught up in all the traditions willingly. But so bloody what? I dont have to be a christian air-head to enjoy this time of the year, or even a gullable child, I like christmas just the way it is, and long may it stay the same.

But it is a weird holiday. It’s by far our nation’s favorite holiday (massive general assumption, but I dare you to argue) and it’s completely supported by 2 giant lies (Santa, Jesus) with the only real part of it being the commercialization, which I’ve no issue with, and the bill’s that drop through the letter box! Now as a student, I’ve come home for Xmas and it’s been wonderful. I’ve spent all my time with my holy trinity, which is: Me, myself and my family and the love and bond couldn’t be stronger, nor my bank balance lower, which supports the copious amounts of drinking that’s to be done. But edging towards my original question, I’m confident enough to say Christmas isn’t a religious holiday, not anymore anyway – it’s a completely open ended holiday, it can be whatever you want it to be. To some its about some silly story, to some its about the traditions and made up crap, and to some its just a bit of commercial worship, but I’d say its safe enough to assume, that to us all, its about friends and family and enjoying all the love they bring to our lives.

To those who various other religious folk who dont celebrate christmas, chill out, have a beer, dont blow one's self up, and join in on a hym or 2

So I wish you all, a very merry Christmas, and a happy new year.

Fuck you Jesus, and fuck you Santa! (oh the joy!)

-Ryan